i love the light of the holidays. december was so full of candles. christmas calendar candles, advent candles, hanukka candles, and just candles. and fairy lights.
i have been a mother of twin boys for four years. two years ago little D came along and joined the fun. still, mentally i have not fully adjusted to the new reality of the holidays. that holidays are not relaxing. not about sleeping in, cuddling up, forgetting myself in a book, watch episode after episode of a favorite show, eating brunch and reading newspapers for hours.
for the past four years holidays have been exhausting. not in a bad way, but still exhausting. they start early with three boys taking over my bed. and then the jumping, running, shouting, playing, talking, arguing, laughing, crying and everything else that comes along with those three little boys. and me and D trying to organize, direct, redirect, guide, comfort, entertain (or sneak in a moment to regain sanity). until by evening they are once again asleep. and i can hardly see straight anymore (see the photos ;)
and that's when the still comes. that sweet quiet that follows a day filled with the kind of noise only kids can make. happy, angry, ultimate, energetic, full of life. it blends with the silence in the air, and i need it, just like i need oxygen.
i still miss the old kind of holidays, and i dream about the day they will return. but i try to breath in the new times, every second of it. even when i'm about to go crazy. cause i know they will be over before i know it, and i will miss them too.
need a few more holidays? jane of spain daily will lead the way.